I'm technically proficient

...despite certain attitude issues

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I need help [RP for Lee] (spoilers for tonight's ER)
standing in the elevator
lockhart_md
After a strangely jarring conversation with the new hospital chaplain, Abby finds herself taking the elevator upstairs, to the surgical department. Making her way to her husband's office, she waffles outside the door, pacing, stalling.

It's not until she sees one of the surgical nurses casting a curious look in her direction that she knocks softly on the door, then pushes it open. She takes a deep breath, running her fingers through her hair, and lets the door close behind her as she steps into Lee's office.

She begins to speak but has to clear her throat before she tries again.
Hey...how's the leg feeling? She approaches her husband slowly, gesturing to his injured leg.

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He shakes his head slightly. Just ibuprofen. I'm still working.

She looks at him skeptically. Still working? I think a camel bite counts as a get out of shift free card.

Probably. Still, I need to be here. Staff conference later. He snorts, looking over at her, thinking she'd rather him be here than at home with her. I didn't know you were on today.

She shrugs a shoulder. I'm not; I just came by to get some paperwork done.

Oh. He squeezes the IV bag again, the sooner it's empty, the sooner he can get rid of it. So you had a chance to see my hungry companion in the ambulance bay?

She nods, growing more and more uncomfortable, feeling like she's close to tears, knowing what she came here to tell her husband. She clears her throat softly. Yeah...When we made our bet I had no idea there'd be live desert animals involved...sorry about that. She chuckles weakly.

He nods, not entirely comfortable himself. Between the throbbing in his leg, their strained relationship and the fact that he'd really rather not fight at work, he stays quiet.

Lee...She runs a hand over her face, drawing in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. When she finally speaks again, her voice is strained in an attempt to keep it steady. I need help.

Hmm? He looks at her, confused at first. Help with what? His expression slowly softens as he takes in the look on her face, the tone of her voice. You...want me to help you?

I thought...I thought I was just...reacting. When David died, when Lily got hurt. The strain is obvious on her face now; a few tears escape, though she wipes them away. I thought I could stop...I can't stop.

He drops the IV bag he's been holding and reaches for her hand, relief almost palpable even if hearing her admit to her addiction breaks his heart. Oh, Abby...it's going to be okay.

She holds his hand tightly, her other hand covering her eyes, elbows on her knees. I...don't know. Her self-doubt is honest but ashamed. I need to get help...I need to go somewhere and get help...

He leans towards her, wincing at the pain it causes but not letting it stop him from wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Okay, whatever you need. We'll do that. Whatever you think you need.

I'm so sorry...She keeps her head down, wiping at her eyes. I need to go soon...I can't keep...You'll take care of Lily?

Hey...shhh...He makes soft noises as he murmurs against her hair, his hand squeezing her shoulder. Wanting her to get help, he hadn't imagined that it would break her this way to ask for it. Didn't think it would squeeze his heart to hear her admit it. Of course I will.

She nods, leaning against him lightly, feeling small, full of failure. I haven't been a good mother.

He moves his hand to rest against her back, hating that he has to agree with her assessment there. That's going to change.

She doesn't deserve how kind he's being, she knows that. She clenches and unclenches her fists and swallows past the thickness in her throat. It won't...It can't, if I'm like this.

He nods, not really knowing what to say to her at this point. Well...you want to get help, so that's a start in the right direction. I'll help you. That's all I've wanted to do, help you.

I filled out the paperwork for a leave...She admits her actual reason for coming to County when she's not on shift.

I don't think your chief is on today...He tries to hide his surprise at her admission, thinking she' have discussed this with him first. So you've made up your mind about this? Did you find a facility with room for you?

She's not...She shakes her head. And no...not yet. I need to call around today.

Do you want me to help with that? He knows he isn't going to be much good in the OR, he was on crutches just to tend to a trauma patient in the ER.

She swallows, knowing he's not going to like this. I need to do this alone, Lee.

He drops his hand from her back. It's always alone with her. Never wanting his help. I see.

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